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Cats New Year Resolutions

1..I will not eat large numbers of assorted bugs,then come home and puke them up so the humans can see that i'm getting plenty of roughage.
2..I will not use the bathtub to store live mice for late-night snacks.

3..I will not perch on my humans chest in the middle of the night and stare into her eyes until she wakes up .

4..I will not complain that my bottom is wet and that i am thristy after sitting in my water bowl.

5..I will not stickmy paw into any container

to see if there is something in it. if I do, I will not hiss and scratch when my human has to shave me to get the rubber cement out of my fur.

6.. When I am chasing my tail and catch my back leg instead, I will not bite down on my foot. This hurts, and my scream scares my human....
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